Warriors and Survivors - 59

Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 59

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

This is the hardest blog for me to write so far. I have so many things in my mind, but I am still unable to write.

Last Monday, almost after half day, I was passing by the corridor to go for a meeting in a hurry, when a mother came to me, she was in hurry too. She was crying openly with tears and was just coming to talk to me. I stopped and listened to her. She said, “Doctor jee, my Abdullah is no more, and I am leaving, I am thankful for whatever you did for me and my child. If there are more people like you, probably no mother will lose her child”.

I was shocked, I had no words to console her but tried to. While I was consoling her, I saw Abdullah’s body lying on a stretcher near the lift, ready to leave. It was the worst scene ever.

I left for the meeting and Abdullah and his mother left for home. It was a long day for me, but two scenes remain in my eyes, Abdullah’s morning situation when I saw him in his room and his last departure scene. I am still drowned in grief.

On the same morning his mother had come to me and said that I should look at Abdullah as his fever was not coming down, and he had continuous vomiting. I went with her and saw Abdullah; he was in semi-unconscious condition due to fever. I checked his medication; his treatment was fair enough for his illness, but he was not responding to it. I discussed with the doctor and Abdullah was shifted to ICU immediately.  I got busy in my routine and then at the end of the day his mother gave the terrible news of his demise.

Abdullah was the warrior of my blog number 53. He was only eight years old at the time of his death and only two and half when he was first diagnosed with ALL. His treatment continued for two years, and he recovered fully. He remained well for another two years and then in 2021 his disease came back. He was admitted again.

As he had relapsed, so his case was to be discussed in board meeting and then his treatment had to be decided. His mother talked to me out of her grief and asked for his early treatment. I did whatever I could to initiate his early relapse treatment. The mother was happy about treatment in spite of the all the troubles she had to bear for this. She used to come to me often to share Abdullah’s condition, his treatment and for counseling. This was because I responded to her with kindness every time and made myself available when she needed. She used to discuss every report and treatment with me even when it was not necessary. Somehow in the last four or five days, she did not come to me, nor I could meet her.

They say that we, the healthcare providers, should not get emotionally entangled with the patients. It is a sound advice for the emotional wellbeing of HCPs. However, when an eight-year-old, innocent child goes down fighting cancer, and though we believe we did what was necessary, but somewhere there is a nagging feeling at the back of the mind that probably something more could have been done. There is a fine line between keeping emotionally intact and becoming aloof. As an HCP, we tread that line every day and sometimes are liable to faltering. Abdullah was a sweet child, and he fought hard till the end. His mother showed great courage and fortitude in the face of imminent death. They shall remain in memory.

Even when nothing much can be done for cancer patients, kindness and humility still matter the most. Positive attitude and encouraging words can bring back patients and their mothers to life. As a health care provider “A day of work for us is a lifetime event for our patients”. It could be our bad, hectic, or tiring day but for our patients it is a matter of life or death, they will remember it for the rest of their lives.

I shall write again on kindness in health providers but here I will conclude my thoughts with some verses whose poet’s name I do not know.

“Advice from a patient”

“This may be a normal day at work for you

But it’s a big day in my life.

The look on your face and the tone of your voice

Can change my entire view of world.

Remember! I am not usually this needy or scared.

I am here, because I trust you, help me stay confident.

I may look like I am out of it,

But I can hear your conversations.

I am not used to being naked around strangers.

Keep that in mind.

I am impatient because I want to get the heck out of here.

Nothing personal.

I don’t speak your language well.

You are going to do what to my what?

I may only be here for four days,

But I will remember you for the rest of my life.

Your patients need your patience.”

We pray for Abdullah and his family. May the family bear the loss with courage and fortitude. Aameen

Prayers for the complete health and recovery of all other warriors who are suffering with their families. May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 

Warriors and Survivors -58

 

 Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 58

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

I wrote about Ubaid ur Rehman in my last blog, the reason I am mentioning him again today is that he is an extraordinary child. A child with firm beliefs, a child with so much knowledge and patience. He is really a child of many qualities that cannot be shared in one blog, but I shall try to summarize in one.

The day I published blog about him, he came to my workplace in the morning and spent almost whole day with me. It was his last chemo. He was Masha Allah happy and satisfied with the thought of going home. He talked a lot and almost on every topic of his life and beliefs.

Children in oncology unit are not so open to talking mostly. They open with someone they are comfortable with or someone they trust. Ubaid ur Rehman belongs to a religious family with strong belief in Allah and His plans. Very few of such blessed people with strong beliefs are seen. He used to say his prayers, he said he used to offer regular prayer in masjid before his surgery, as he wears arm sling since his surgery. His training is done mostly by his father who is not only a Hakeem but also a true practicing Muslim. His father and five elder brothers have trained him so well about life and realities of life.

Ubaid ur Rehman knows how bad the continuous use of smart phone is, he also knows about bad radiations from gadgets. He loves to study and reads kids and Islamic books on different topics.

He knows all details of his family and family ethics, he said he gifted his Aunt from his Eid money (Eidi). He is so generous to give Eidi to his nephews. Yes, He is uncle of two nephews at such a young age Masha Allah.

Discussion will be incomplete if I will not write about his thought on his disease. He believes that this disease is from Allah and a test for him and his family. He thinks that he should be patient enough to bear this trial. Ubaid said that whenever he did not want to come to hospital and could not find courage to come and admit for chemo, he used to recite dua for difficulty. With reciting that dua, he always was courageous enough to bear that treatment.

Ubaid told that during two years treatment, it happened once that his father was angry when he was not ready to come to hospital. But his father made him realize politely that how much treatment is necessary for Ubaid and made him learn this dua for difficulty. He has also learned prayers for sleeping when it is not possible for him to sleep out of stress about his disease.

I was shocked to hear from him that he also knows that one day his father will be no more with him, and he has to prepare himself for that time, he has to be strong enough to bear his father’s absence. He is such a young soul and knows the realities of life, many of us cannot accept the truth when our parents leave this mortal world.

Ubaid ur Rehman wants to be a Muslim scholar and doctor as well. He chooses his friends very carefully. He said he only befriends children who have habit of regular prayers. What a mature and blessed soul. I am inspired by his training and beliefs, and I wanted to share that it is all about proper and considerate training and we can raise children like Ubaid ur Rehman.

 

We pray for the health and happiness of Ubaid ur Rehman and his family and that every child should have beliefs and training like him. May he remain healthy always and may his disease never come back and may he is able to realize his dreams. Aameen

Prayers for the complete health and recovery all other warriors who are suffering with their families. May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 

Warriors and Survivors - 57

 

Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 57

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

His first expression was that of an angry looking child. When I first saw him, he was leaving his room. I asked where he was going. He stopped and gave a strange look and said to me, “Do I ask you when you go somewhere”.

I was not expecting this answer from apparently healthy-looking child. Today he came to me to ask about his chemo dose. He knows everything about his treatment and chemotherapy. He knows exactly how many chemo cycles have been completed. He remembers when his MRI was done and when he had to go for surgery. He knows every minor detail of his treatment.

Ubaid ur Rehman is ten years old healthy-looking child but in fact he is not healthy. He has undergone a very long cancer treatment so far. Two years ago, he felt pain in his right arm. It was usual pain, so his parents did not pay much heed. His pain got severe so his father who is Hakeem in Lahore gave him medicines. But pain was getting worse, and parents had to go for a proper check up. As per routine procedure Ubaid ur Rehman was treated by general physicians and then orthopedic doctors. Finally, he was diagnosed as case of Ewings Sarcoma of right humerus.

His treatment started in children’s hospital oncology unit and the poor kid had to go through 12 long chemotherapy cycles. He remembers the dates when he was first diagnosed and when his chemo cycles were started. Today he told me that he had four cycles and then his MRI of right arm was done. After that he had to go through another six chemo cycles and then in between his humerus mass was resected in a surgery.

Now he is on last chemo cycle, he wears arm support. He says he is feeling better Alhumdolilah and he will be discharged soon. He is quite happy for the news that he is going home for good.

To my surprise, he knows exactly what consultant asked in today’s round about his condition and further treatment plans. Normally kids of this age do not know and remember such details. But Ubaid ur Rehman is different. He has also remembered some part of Quran by heart. He had to take a break because of his treatment. Now he will continue from where he left.

Ubaid ur Rehman was a student of class six when he had to leave his studies due to his disease. He is fond of studies and learning Quran. He has five brothers, and he is the youngest of all. Two of his eldest brothers are married. He says his family has a large house and they all live together with grandparents.

Ubaid ur Rehman’s mother was not with him today due to her gastric surgery recently. His aunt was taking care of him. We pray for his complete recovery and that his disease may never come back. Aameen. We pray that he is able to continue his Hifz and studies soon. Aameen.

We pray for the ease of Ubaid ur Rehman and his family and the complete health and recovery of a cute angry boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 

Warriors and Survivors - 56

Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 56

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

Its matter of deep grief when six years old says to his mother that “take me home or I will die”.

Ameer Hamza is only six years old with a very shining smile. He is not willing to stay at hospital for his treatment. He wants to leave home and asks her mother repeatedly to take him to home to meet with siblings. Poor soul is also deprived of his father’s love.

Ameer Hamza has three siblings, two sisters and one brother. Her mother is smart young lady who is managing her four kids single handedly. Ameer Hamza’s father does not work and left his family. He is not interested in working and earning for his little kids, so he left his wife and children alone.

The poor mother is coming for treatment from Kasur for two years. Ameer was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma in early 2021. Her mother was wise enough to take her son to hospital for proper diagnosis and treatment even in such worst family circumstances.

His treatment initiated in early 2021 and just after two chemo cycles mother disappeared with her child from hospital in Sep 2021. The family did not show for further treatment for almost four months due to family issues.

In January 2022, he appeared with neck swelling on right side. Ameer Hamza was admitted again, and he had to undergo re evaluation. After many diagnostic and routine tests his chemo was started again. 

He is still on chemo, and he will have to undergo many chemo cycles for his complete treatment. But the problem is Ameer Hamza does not want to stay in hospital despite he is surrounded by so many children of his age. He is afraid of injections and needles.

His mother was holding a two-year-old daughter, she is a brave lady who is fighting this battle along with responsibility of raising her four children alone. To her good luck, her mother and brother are taking care of the family.

Even though it is impossible to bear so much but with Allah’s grace she is managing treatment, family, and travel.

Ameer Hamza is such a cute little child with so much pain and suffering behind. He needs a lot of chemo and medications to defeat his disease but is afraid of needles. I want to anything for his cure, but we only can do our part to reduce the sufferings around us and these little deeds may play an important role to ease others. May Allah give us courage, stamina and may He enable us to help others in need.

 

We also can pray for the ease of the Ameer Hamza and his family and the complete health and recovery of cute smiling boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 Warriors and Survivors - Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 56

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

Its matter of deep grief when six years old says to his mother that “take me home or I will die”.

Ameer Hamza is only six years old with a very shining smile. He is not willing to stay at hospital for his treatment. He wants to leave home and asks her mother repeatedly to take him to home to meet with siblings. Poor soul is also deprived of his father’s love.

Ameer Hamza has three siblings, two sisters and one brother. Her mother is smart young lady who is managing her four kids single handedly. Ameer Hamza’s father does not work and left his family. He is not interested in working and earning for his little kids, so he left his wife and children alone.

The poor mother is coming for treatment from Kasur for two years. Ameer was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma in early 2021. Her mother was wise enough to take her son to hospital for proper diagnosis and treatment even in such worst family circumstances.

His treatment initiated in early 2021 and just after two chemo cycles mother disappeared with her child from hospital in Sep 2021. The family did not show for further treatment for almost four months due to family issues.

In January 2022, he appeared with neck swelling on right side. Ameer Hamza was admitted again, and he had to undergo re evaluation. After many diagnostic and routine tests his chemo was started again. 

He is still on chemo, and he will have to undergo many chemo cycles for his complete treatment. But the problem is Ameer Hamza does not want to stay in hospital despite he is surrounded by so many children of his age. He is afraid of injections and needles.

His mother was holding a two-year-old daughter, she is a brave lady who is fighting this battle along with responsibility of raising her four children alone. To her good luck, her mother and brother are taking care of the family.

Even though it is impossible to bear so much but with Allah’s grace she is managing treatment, family, and travel.

Ameer Hamza is such a cute little child with so much pain and suffering behind. He needs a lot of chemo and medications to defeat his disease but is afraid of needles. I want to anything for his cure, but we only can do our part to reduce the sufferings around us and these little deeds may play an important role to ease others. May Allah give us courage, stamina and may He enable us to help others in need.

 

We also can pray for the ease of the Ameer Hamza and his family and the complete health and recovery of cute smiling boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 Warriors and Survivors - Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 56

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

Its matter of deep grief when six years old says to his mother that “take me home or I will die”.

Ameer Hamza is only six years old with a very shining smile. He is not willing to stay at hospital for his treatment. He wants to leave home and asks her mother repeatedly to take him to home to meet with siblings. Poor soul is also deprived of his father’s love.

Ameer Hamza has three siblings, two sisters and one brother. Her mother is smart young lady who is managing her four kids single handedly. Ameer Hamza’s father does not work and left his family. He is not interested in working and earning for his little kids, so he left his wife and children alone.

The poor mother is coming for treatment from Kasur for two years. Ameer was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma in early 2021. Her mother was wise enough to take her son to hospital for proper diagnosis and treatment even in such worst family circumstances.

His treatment initiated in early 2021 and just after two chemo cycles mother disappeared with her child from hospital in Sep 2021. The family did not show for further treatment for almost four months due to family issues.

In January 2022, he appeared with neck swelling on right side. Ameer Hamza was admitted again, and he had to undergo re evaluation. After many diagnostic and routine tests his chemo was started again. 

He is still on chemo, and he will have to undergo many chemo cycles for his complete treatment. But the problem is Ameer Hamza does not want to stay in hospital despite he is surrounded by so many children of his age. He is afraid of injections and needles.

His mother was holding a two-year-old daughter, she is a brave lady who is fighting this battle along with responsibility of raising her four children alone. To her good luck, her mother and brother are taking care of the family.

Even though it is impossible to bear so much but with Allah’s grace she is managing treatment, family, and travel.

Ameer Hamza is such a cute little child with so much pain and suffering behind. He needs a lot of chemo and medications to defeat his disease but is afraid of needles. I want to anything for his cure, but we only can do our part to reduce the sufferings around us and these little deeds may play an important role to ease others. May Allah give us courage, stamina and may He enable us to help others in need.

 

We also can pray for the ease of the Ameer Hamza and his family and the complete health and recovery of cute smiling boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 Warriors and Survivors - Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 56

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

Its matter of deep grief when six years old says to his mother that “take me home or I will die”.

Ameer Hamza is only six years old with a very shining smile. He is not willing to stay at hospital for his treatment. He wants to leave home and asks her mother repeatedly to take him to home to meet with siblings. Poor soul is also deprived of his father’s love.

Ameer Hamza has three siblings, two sisters and one brother. Her mother is smart young lady who is managing her four kids single handedly. Ameer Hamza’s father does not work and left his family. He is not interested in working and earning for his little kids, so he left his wife and children alone.

The poor mother is coming for treatment from Kasur for two years. Ameer was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma in early 2021. Her mother was wise enough to take her son to hospital for proper diagnosis and treatment even in such worst family circumstances.

His treatment initiated in early 2021 and just after two chemo cycles mother disappeared with her child from hospital in Sep 2021. The family did not show for further treatment for almost four months due to family issues.

In January 2022, he appeared with neck swelling on right side. Ameer Hamza was admitted again, and he had to undergo re evaluation. After many diagnostic and routine tests his chemo was started again. 

He is still on chemo, and he will have to undergo many chemo cycles for his complete treatment. But the problem is Ameer Hamza does not want to stay in hospital despite he is surrounded by so many children of his age. He is afraid of injections and needles.

His mother was holding a two-year-old daughter, she is a brave lady who is fighting this battle along with responsibility of raising her four children alone. To her good luck, her mother and brother are taking care of the family.

Even though it is impossible to bear so much but with Allah’s grace she is managing treatment, family, and travel.

Ameer Hamza is such a cute little child with so much pain and suffering behind. He needs a lot of chemo and medications to defeat his disease but is afraid of needles. I want to anything for his cure, but we only can do our part to reduce the sufferings around us and these little deeds may play an important role to ease others. May Allah give us courage, stamina and may He enable us to help others in need.

 

We also can pray for the ease of the Ameer Hamza and his family and the complete health and recovery of cute smiling boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity

 

Warriors and Survivors - Children Cancer Stories by Rukh Yusuf - Blog # 56

 

I am Rukh Yusuf, Clinical Pharmacist, also specialized in Total Parenteral Nutrition and Bone Marrow Transplant. I have been working in Pediatric Oncology unit of a public hospital for several years. The mission of this blog is to bring to you the real-life stories of child patients suffering from cancer. Cancer is still a difficult disease to handle and treat. However, when it strikes the children, some so young that they cannot even speak, their agony is beyond expression and words. Let us pray especially for children suffering from cancer for early and complete remission. May Allah shower His Merciful Blessings upon them. Aameen.

Its matter of deep grief when six years old says to his mother that “take me home or I will die”.

Ameer Hamza is only six years old with a very shining smile. He is not willing to stay at hospital for his treatment. He wants to leave home and asks her mother repeatedly to take him to home to meet with siblings. Poor soul is also deprived of his father’s love.

Ameer Hamza has three siblings, two sisters and one brother. Her mother is smart young lady who is managing her four kids single handedly. Ameer Hamza’s father does not work and left his family. He is not interested in working and earning for his little kids, so he left his wife and children alone.

The poor mother is coming for treatment from Kasur for two years. Ameer was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma in early 2021. Her mother was wise enough to take her son to hospital for proper diagnosis and treatment even in such worst family circumstances.

His treatment initiated in early 2021 and just after two chemo cycles mother disappeared with her child from hospital in Sep 2021. The family did not show for further treatment for almost four months due to family issues.

In January 2022, he appeared with neck swelling on right side. Ameer Hamza was admitted again, and he had to undergo re evaluation. After many diagnostic and routine tests his chemo was started again. 

He is still on chemo, and he will have to undergo many chemo cycles for his complete treatment. But the problem is Ameer Hamza does not want to stay in hospital despite he is surrounded by so many children of his age. He is afraid of injections and needles.

His mother was holding a two-year-old daughter, she is a brave lady who is fighting this battle along with responsibility of raising her four children alone. To her good luck, her mother and brother are taking care of the family.

Even though it is impossible to bear so much but with Allah’s grace she is managing treatment, family, and travel.

Ameer Hamza is such a cute little child with so much pain and suffering behind. He needs a lot of chemo and medications to defeat his disease but is afraid of needles. I want to anything for his cure, but we only can do our part to reduce the sufferings around us and these little deeds may play an important role to ease others. May Allah give us courage, stamina and may He enable us to help others in need.

 

We also can pray for the ease of the Ameer Hamza and his family and the complete health and recovery of cute smiling boy and all other warriors who are suffering with their families.

May Allah ease and cure all patients and cancer warriors.

 

Note: Names have been changed to protect identity